10:47 PM SIDEBURNS: you [your turn at scrabble]
10:51 PM IRIS: your turn
can I ask you an awkward personal question that you can totally decline to answer if you don’t want to?
10:54 PM SIDEBURNS: um
10:55 PM about 6 inches.
give or take.
IRIS: good to know, but that wasn’t my question.
hm, that might have been the wrong emoticon to use…
SIDEBURNS: why? how high can YOU jump?
10:56 PM IRIS: I can’t jump. it’s written into my contract.
SIDEBURNS: so i win then
10:57 PM IRIS: yes. your certificate is in the mail.
SIDEBURNS: sweet
what’s the real question?
11:02 PM IRIS: I’ve been pondering things lately, and I wondered why it was you decided I was a better friend than a date.
11:03 PM SIDEBURNS: hmm.
i dunno.
did I decide that?
11:04 PM IRIS: yeah.
a while ago.
SIDEBURNS: dinnae.
just went with my gut I guess.
11:05 PM typically when i meet someone from the internet, I assume friendship.
i’ve met maybe….
um
a couple dozen.
and dated….four.
maybe five. depending on your definition
11:06 PM that’s over the course of. uh.
six years or so, mind you
11:08 PM IRIS: that’s less enlightening than I would have hoped. but it is what it is.
SIDEBURNS: oh right.
11:09 PM and I’m also only into dudes, i forgot.
IRIS: shut it, smartass.
11:10 PM I’m having self-worth issues and trying to figure out what the hell is wrong with me/everyone else/or if anything is in fact, wrong at all.
11:11 PM SIDEBURNS: i don’t think anything’s wrong
why would you think there is?
11:12 PM IRIS: the fact that the only people who want to be in relationships with me are the ones I don’t like.
and the ones I do like don’t like me.
11:13 PM SIDEBURNS: i think probably 99% of single people feel that way
and 99% of people in relationships are in bad relationships
we have a very fucked up concept of romance in this hemisphere
11:14 PM IRIS: how so?
SIDEBURNS: too many movies
too many stories with happy endings
11:15 PM they all teach us the same lesson
if you are alone you are incomplete
pair off, mate and die
the end
grim view of life
11:16 PM life has no happy endings
nor sad endings
nothing ever ends
11:17 PM a happy couple turns into a widow and a dead person
IRIS: well, true.
I don’t think I’m incomplete.
your turn
SIDEBURNS: no, you don’t
but do you feel it?
11:18 PM IRIS: I don’t think incomplete is what I feel.
no.
annoyed, maybe.
that I have awesome things to share.
and I have people to share them with, friends, et al,
11:19 PM but I cannot snog my friends.
well, only sometimes.
after drinking.
11:20 PM SIDEBURNS: it takes drinking?
IRIS: especially with my married friends.
SIDEBURNS: bummer. there’s nothing a like a good sober snogging with someone you respect.
11:21 PM your turn
11:22 PM IRIS: which is my whole point- I am a big ball of fail when it comes to snogging people I respect.
11:23 PM SIDEBURNS: really?
you snogged me once or twice. am I not worthy of your respect?
11:26 PM IRIS: well, yes- I totally respect you. and think you’re awesome. which is why I posed the whole “why no date” question. because the people I think are awesome – like the last guy I dated, who left me for an actress in a show he was in- don’t stick around.
11:27 PM all i have are vowels, and one D.
SIDEBURNS: doodad?
IRIS: I’m tryin’
11:28 PM SIDEBURNS: i dunno.
i’m the wrong person to ask about this, I think.
11:29 PM IRIS: yeah? aren’t you taking psych classes? or was it physics…
SIDEBURNS: psych
but i’m still just learning
IRIS: I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable.
11:30 PM SIDEBURNS: nah
IRIS: your turn
SIDEBURNS: lucky you caught me after a couple of beers, though
me: heh
11:31 PM SIDEBURNS: the downside to that is, now i am sleepy
IRIS: beer will do that.
11:32 PM SIDEBURNS: you sleep well when you get there.
11:33 PM IRIS: will do. and I promise to stop having whiny babycrier conversations with you.
SIDEBURNS: ha
it’s ok. i don’t judge.
goodnight.
IRIS: night
May 12, 2009...9:27 am
Sideburns
Jump to Comments
6 Comments
May 12, 2009 at 4:43 pm
Careful there. They will find you.
May 12, 2009 at 10:35 pm
Was I referred in that convo or do you make the lip smashy with all your married friends?
May 13, 2009 at 7:19 pm
No, not /all/ of my married friends– just you and Al, as far as I remember.
May 14, 2009 at 5:17 am
Dang it! I so want him to want you, but he was quite vague there. Sounds like a cool/intelligent/funny guy .
May 24, 2009 at 12:08 pm
That conversation was better had with a brick wall. He played the passive/aggressive I want to get the fuck out of this fork in the road. You reached the fuck me fork situation. He tells you you’re unattractive or he’s honest with you. He did neither. This conversation left me cold. As I assumed it did you as well. You played along well. Just don’t have these types of conversations with this emotionally unavailable male and you will be just fine love.
May 24, 2009 at 12:10 pm
Never apologize for asking the obvious question. If he didn’t want to answer it, he would have told you no. Never apologize for being you.